Editing Detective, Susan Eder

Image courtsey of CARTOONSTOCK

1) Edmonton Sun, April 16, 2010

Press 'play' to Rape

by Thane Burneltt

PROBLEM: Wrong Spelling

“There’s no child stumbling onto this online,” he tells QMI Agency, adding parents should be more troubled by their children watching another instalment of the hard-core torture franchise, Saw.

SOLUTION: change instalment to installment

2) Edmonton Journal, April 16, 2010
Alberta education team to visit Northland school communities
by Sarah O'Donnell

PROBLEM: Sentences are extremely long for on-line writing.

This sentence has 51 words:

The detailed look at the Northland School Division comes at the request of Education Minister Dave Hancock, who made the dramatic decision to disbanded the district’s board of trustees in January, citing concern about student performance, high school graduation rates and other problems, such as a new $12.5-million school sitting empty.

This sentence has 53 words:

The inquiry team — made up of David van Tamelen, a former superintendent of the Peace River school division, Nathan Matthew, former chief of the Simpcw First Nation and the Shuswap Nation Tribal Council, and Keith Wagner, former deputy superintendent of the Grande Prairie school district — is to have a final report with advice on the future of Northland to Hancock by the fall.

SOLUTION: Break up sentences into shorter sentences. Avoid the use of "and" and try not to use so many commas.

The blog post by Isaac Kaplyuk also has some good examples of errors found online.

As I was going to the market on Sunday April 18, 2010 I noticed this sign posted at the KFC on 111 Ave close to Westmount. So I took a picture and here's what I saw.

"BUKET" is definitely not a word. The correct word should be "BUCKET". I presume they left out the "C" as there wasn't room for it; however, it would have been much better to leave out the word "new" and put "variety" and "bucket" on separate lines. Leaving out a letter in the sign makes me wonder - Do they leave out the chicken in a chicken sandwich? Do they leave out the napkins in a take-out order? What else do they leave out?